The Easiest Birthday Party In The History of The World

Posted by Frank B. on 01/16/2012

The Easiest Birthday Party In The History of The World (or two)

We’ve reached another milestone and I’m not sure I like it. After years of sitting in church sans children for seven years, my oldest has outgrown Children’s Church. It came as a total shock. I hadn’t even mentally prepared myself. One Sunday a few weeks ago, it just happened.

Aubrey left to go to Children’s Church then came back and whispered, “MOMMA IT’S NOT TIME FOR MY CLASS YET.”

And so it began. Now instead of leaning up against my husband, holding hands and listening to the preacher as my mommy induced PTSD This a a nice picture takes a brief hiatus, Aubrey sits in between us, whispering a little too loudly and attempting to boss us around via notes scribbled on her church bulletin.

Aubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to write a 300 word essay describing in vivid and misspelled detail exactly how she feels. If she isn’t allowed to wear her hot pink mesh, fingerless Madonna gloves purchased for an 80s themed party with her smocked dress there will be illustrations of “The saddest girl in the whole werld,” to occupy our time.

Last Sunday Aubrey scribbled furiously during the sermon and kept passing me her bulletin and whispering, “Your turn!”

Categories: APPLES 9 Responses


Frank on 02/18/2012 Aubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to write by frank
Frank on 02/18/2012 Aubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to writeAubrey is very expressive. If denied a doughnut before church it is not unusual for her to write by frank
on 02/18/2012 a third comment
on 02/18/2012 a third comment
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